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[8th Ed] Most Rediculous Battle 2000 pts
Author Message[8th Ed] Most Rediculous Battle 2000 pts
Helblindi
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Post: #1
[8th Ed] Most Rediculous Battle 2000 ptsHelblindi 01-09-2017

Hey guys,

Played a battle yesterday (man, it had been a while!) against Daemons of Chaos. Magic was a joke, shooting was a joke. Most of the damage to both our armies was self inflicted, and the end was absolutely retarded. This battle may be the only actual argument in favour of destroying the olde worlde Happy
This is just gonna be a real quick report. It's gonna be fuzzy on the details and inaccurate here and there as I took no noted. Just writing this now from memory.

I had:
-Lord Ettin on Sfavnir: Sorc Proph lvl 3 LoHashut on Bale Taurus
-20 hobgob archers FC
-20 IG FC
-22 IG great weapon FC
-2 x Deathshrieker
-Magma Cannon
-Siege Giant
no buffs

My opponent had:
-Mask of Slaanesh, blade of eternity or something like that (+d3 to WS, S, T, I)
-3 Bloodcrushers
-Skull Cannon
-40 Bloodletters, buffed somehow, don't remember what exactly
-10 pink horrors
-3 plague drones

I deployed in one corner, he spread wide

The magma cannon and one deathshrieker are auxiliary troops from Tjub, by the way Happy


I finished deploying first and got first turn. I rushed my archers into the tower. Rest moved forward, now I think I should've stayed back, maybe get an extra round of shooting.
Lord Ettin set the tone for his later shame by starting the game hiding behind the tower.
He then cast Ash Storm on the Skull Cannon with Irresistable Force, reducing himself to a lvl 1 wizard with only a Magic Missile spell.
Rockets were fired to the Skullcannon, but all missed. Some bloodletters died of magma.


Mask of Slaanesh charged my IG, Cannon had to stay put.
The Mask had some plans for an awesome hex on my IG, to then slaughter them utterly (I don't know which spell exactly), but then rolled snake eyes for the winds of magic, which meant several units took some wounds from angry gods in the Warp. He then used his two dice to cast some spell, but rolled snake eyes again: auto fail.
In shooting, the cannon overshot the goblin archers and the ball landed on Lord Ettin, who was saved by a 5+ ward save against flaming.
IG held their own in CC, I didn't keep a detailed tally of the slain.


The giant put himself to good use and charged the mask. Choosing an attack which required an initiative test from his I-13 opponent. IG still held their own. Archers shot some more bloodletters. Rocket launchers again missed their targets.Magma cannon misfired without any damage.


Bloodcrushers set up a charge for next time.
Plague Drones charged the GW IG, and a grind began.
Bloodletters charged the giant, killed it, and were then crushed beneath it's falling corpse. The Mask was already wounded by the end of CC and died from CR.
The Sorc Prophet didn't actually move, but I corrected a wrong angle.
Skull Cannon shot and hit Lord Ettin, but again 5++ save.


Lord Ettin charged into the Bloodletters. Blazing body and Thunderstomp allowed for just enough CR to kill every last remaining Bloodletter and the Herald.
A single Bloodcrusher was burned to death.
Deathshrieker 1 did nothing, Deathshrieker 2 blew himself up.


Bloodcrushers destroyed the Deathshrieker and overran into the Magma Cannon. Meanwhile, the Plague Drones were eradicated.
Skull Cannon shot and hit Lord Ettin, but then rolled  a 1 to wound!


Lord Ettin charged the Skull Cannon, used his breath weapon and then killed it utterly.
Double charge from both IG blocks killed the Bloodcrushers, but not without losing the Magma Cannon.
Archers shot some pink horrors, as there was nothing else to shoot.

Before we move on. Let me point out that I had been incredibly lucky with the dice for most of the game, except for IF-ing my first spell. Mask of Slaanesh had 9 attacks at insane strength, but two turns in a row only got 1 or 2 wounds through. The GIG lost combat twice, once needing to roll 7 or less, and rolling 7, once needing to roll 6 or less, and rolling exactly six. Every time I tried to dispell, I rolled exactly the number required. I don't think my opponent got a single spell off. It was like a big middlefinger from the dice gods.

My opponent was handling it like a real sport, insisting to finish the battle. So when he charged my general, there was a well deserved shift in luck. By the end of close combat, he had lost 3 horrors and had managed to put a wound of my prophet. Taking charge and flag into account, combat resolution was a draw, but his musician forced me to test on Ld10. I rolled 11. No BSB in range, so I ran, but only 6", allowing the 4 remaining pink horrors to run Lord Ettin down.



I still won, of course. My gobbos shot them all dead, though I think this actually took 2 turns of fire. Goblin Archers seemed to be the stars of the battle...

In hindsight, I think this was just a fluke in statistics and there is nothing to be learned from this Happy


Helblindi's Throng: Karak Brothar
My Evil Throng: Helblindi's Legion
My Blood Bowl stuff

This post was last modified: 01-09-2017 03:14 PM by Helblindi.

01-09-2017 03:06 PM
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Malorndk
Greater Daemon of Hashut
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Post: #2
RE: [8th Ed] Most Rediculous Battle 2000 ptsMalorndk 01-09-2017

Ahahahahaha

This is one of those games where you get reminded that randomness of dice rolling sometimes matters way more than your cunning plans and strategy. Lots of silliness going on here but in a good way. You need a game like this from time to time, even though the players feel like they didn't really play warhammer xD

I had i similar kinda game some years ago vs VC with a Master necromancer and Vampire Lord in the centre of a summoning army.
Turn 2 I cast Pit of shades on the bunker unit. Both characters failed their look out sirs and initiative test. The statistic probability was ridiculous, but i happened. Game over :S


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01-09-2017 03:55 PM
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